Tag Archives: fears

How to Not Be Afraid

Ever wanted to jump out of an airplane, give a major speech to a sold-out crowd, pet an anaconda, or fight back the zombie apocalypse…or at least, not be afraid to do any of the following?

One of the biggest ways to conquer fear is to be generous. Okay…maybe generosity won’t conquer your fear of snakes or heights, but it does have an amazing propensity to fight fears of inadequacy, not having enough, not keeping up, and so much more.

In The Generosity Bet (and its predecessor, Stories of the Generous Life), we interviewed 42 people about their life stories and what they have learned about giving along the way. These people ranged from janitors to billionaires, college students to retirees, farmers to Wall Street traders. But one theme common to all of them? They are some of the most fearless people you’ll ever meet.

Generosity does that to you. It weasels out all the little things you hold onto, the things you’re afraid to let go, the fears and little pleasures you’ve nestled away in quiet dark places where you think no one else will find them, so no one else can want them or take them. It makes you confront your heart and realize how often you’ve doubted that God is good and that God will provide when He’s asked you to give.

Generosity pulls your heart into the light. Wide-eyed and blinking and maybe stumbling a little, you begin to uncurl your fingers around the things that once seemed so important—that time, those resources, that influence, that security in your stuff, that appearance of being better than the Joneses, that control.

And as you begin to give away, you begin to discover something else. You begin to see, to truly see people and needs and what it means to be alive and human. And you begin to see God, to see that He’s still vibrantly alive and working and light is spreading and the darkness is fading away.

You find that the more you give away, the more your hands come back full—come back full of joy. And the more you soak your heart in joy, the more your hands can give away, because you don’t need stuff to make you feel good or look okay. Most of all, the more you give away, the less you fear because you don’t have the need to hold on so tight anymore.

So take a step toward fearlessness and toward joy. Be generous.

For more ideas on how to start your generosity journey, pick up a copy of The Generosity Bet today!

3 Reasons We’re Afraid of Generosity

Generosity can be one of those touchy subjects. Aside from the fact that many pastors are reluctant to preach on it, and those who are givers are often hesitant to discuss it for fear of seeming boastful, the subject of generosity has a way of striking at sensitive core issues like none other.

There are three main reasons that generosity exposes so many raw nerves.

  • Fear. Many times we are afraid of generosity because we fear what we might be asked to give up or give away. And there are so many forms that fear can take—fear of not having enough, fear of loss of security, fear of loss of standard of living, fear of loss of financial freedom, fear of giving up something we desire, etc.
  • Guilt. Some of it has to do with our own consciences. We’re secretly afraid that we should be doing more or that God won’t be pleased with us until we reach a certain place of generosity.
  • Control. Sometimes we don’t like being told what to do. We don’t want to be told what we can do with our resources. Or, we want to ensure that our money is only spent in ways that we know are worthwhile.

Some of these objections to generosity have roots in good desires. For example, if we fear generosity means we won’t have enough on a rainy day, that fear ultimately comes from the good desire to provide for our families. However, the issue is our fallen nature has twisted those good desires into bonds that control us and tempt us to take matters into our own hands.

When God asks us to be generous, it’s not because He needs our money or resources. He already owns them all. It’s not because if we don’t give, then a ministry won’t be supported. God asks us to give because He loves us and He wants our hearts. Generosity is one of the tools God uses to help our hearts let go. It frees us to love God with a whole and unafraid heart.

In the new The Generosity Bet book, Henry Kaestner shared about how he and his wife felt like they were being generous. At the time, they were “double-tithing,” or giving about 20 percent. However, when a friend challenged him about why he gave, Henry realized how his giving stemmed from thinking that now God must be pleased with him.

Or, in the case of Anne Irwin, a mother and a business owner, when God asked her to start a giving circle to bring other women into generosity, she kept using the excuse that she was just too busy.

However, as both Anne and Henry looked at their motivations and just chose to take the next step into generosity, they began understanding the joy of giving. And through giving their time, resources, and passions, God began freeing their hearts to love Him more.

So, what is your heart holding onto? What next step of generosity might God be calling you to take so you can live free and live without fear?

For more stories like these, and for practical ideas for taking the next step in your generosity journey, order your copy of The Generosity Bet today.

What if my gift isn’t used wisely?

Many times when people consider giving, one of their biggest fears is that their money won’t be used wisely, whether it’s given to a homeless person, a struggling neighbor, or even to their local church. Since this is a common struggle, and at times, a legitimate concern, it’s an important issue to address.

What is God asking me to do?

First and foremost, we should always be asking where God is calling us to give. Be sensitive to those “God nudges” that ask you to notice someone, to give. An older gentleman, one of the most generous people I know, said that when he’s in a position for spontaneous generosity, he’s found he needs to obey those God nudges within 10 seconds, otherwise his more logical brain will talk himself out of it. Of course, this doesn’t mean to give to everything that pulls your emotional strings—instead, it’s about very intentionally and carefully listening for God’s voice.  Continue reading